


used to be so interested (before your fucking memes)

by transstevebucky



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Coming Out, Fluff, I do that a lot sorry, Mentions of homophobia, THIS IS ANOTHER TUMBLR BASED THING, Tumblr!Harry, this is more light hearted than like anything I've ever written
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-10
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-24 06:45:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1595438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/transstevebucky/pseuds/transstevebucky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry becomes addicted to Tumblr. It affects his and Louis's relationship in ways that, sometimes, aren't beneficial.</p>
            </blockquote>





	used to be so interested (before your fucking memes)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [icecreamandlarry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/icecreamandlarry/gifts).



> this is fluffy and lighthearted and comedic and dumb and based on a tumblr post (because everything I write is)

It started, as most things did with them, with Tumblr.

Harry was certifiably addicted to the blogging site; completely and utterly entranced with how one minute you’d be staring at little kittens running through a field and the next, a cock being plunged deep into a twink’s ass. It was wonderful. 

It truly was great, unless you were in public. And then you had to explain why you were laughing. And, mostly, you’d be laughing at a zoomed in picture of a goat with the words ‘fuckin no’ surrounding the head. So, yeah, Harry was addicted to the site. And the second he logged in, it just went downhill from there.

Harry knew he had to keep his blog secret; thought it was really cool that he got to have a second identity wherein he could pretend to just be a Larry shipper rather than being actually in the relationship. But he was instantly valued in the community, because his headcanons were completely on point. Of course, the reason behind this was that he knew what they did every second of every day and how they fucked, but. Whatever. He was respected in the Larry fandom, and within a matter of weeks he gained three thousand followers.

True, this was because he wrote fanfiction about he and Louis fucking on top of a house, under the stars, but he wasn’t going to be technical.

So, he was addicted to it. And maybe, sometimes, Tumblr got in the way of his sex life. He’d occasionally let slip a little ‘I just want to slide deep into your soul, boy’ and Louis would sigh and tell him to go away. But then Louis would blow him and Harry would rim Louis and it’d be fine, until the next slip up.

 

So it was fair to say that, although the site was fucking hilarious and the shippers were almost always completely on point with their theories, it was slowly ruining his fucking life.

 

***

 

It was on one of the nights of the early Where We Are tour and Harry was aimlessly scrolling through the website of Smoothness and Social Justice. He was getting slowly more and more riled up about the fact some dickhead had said that gender was dictated by genitalia when Louis walked into their hotel room.

A towel hung low on his hips, and Harry slowly let his eyes traipse over the expanse of soft, washed skin on his fiancé’s body and smiled. It was a slow, dopey smile, that started at the corners and then reached the centre. Louis often pulled those smiles out of him. The fandom called them his Louis Smiles. It wasn’t the only time they were correct. After all, they got the whole Chicken Stuffed With Mozzarella Wrapped In Parma Ham story down to a tee in about two seconds.

“Such wow.” Harry whispered, just as Louis was about to drop the towel. “Much sex.”

Louis pulled a face, hiked the towel back up, and jumped onto their bed. Harry shifted beside him, and Louis glared, arms crossed over his chest. He was dripping onto the bed, which Harry would normally reprimand him for, but he was currently reblogging a picture of Cole Sprouse, so he was otherwise engaged. Of course, his other half was literally two centimetres away, naked minus a towel, but. There were things to reblog.

“Your obsession with that fucking site is getting ridiculous. Even Niall has started talking like a fucking meme.” Louis says, glaring. His blue eyes are sharp and piercing, and Harry would write a text post about it. But it might be a bit of a give away, considering how many close shaves he’s had in the past. 

“It’s doge, Louis. And it’s a lifestyle.” Harry says, giggling under his breath at a text post talking about Benedict Cumberbatch appears on his phone’s screen. 

“For fucks sake, Harry, I remember when you used to swarm all over me when I get out of the shower. The only way you will these days is if you can quote a fucking headcanon one of our shippers stated.” Louis huffs, turning away. His chin is rough with beard, and Harry remembers with a shiver the week before, the beard burn on his thigh making it almost impossible to walk without waddling. It was the main reason he asked him to grow it, anyway. 

“To be fair, Lou, most of the shippers are actually really cute. They figured out the hair bet, remember?” Harry asks, tapping Louis on his shoulder. He didn’t turn.

“I don’t care.”

“Lou.”

“I just don’t care, Harry.”

“Lou.”

“What the fuck are you doing?”

“I thought you didn’t care, Lou.”

“I fucking care when you put your cock on my fucking back!”  
“Well turn the fuck over so we can frickle frackle.”

“I’m fucking dumping you after we frickle frackle!”

“Please don’t. I want to just dittle dattle you forever.”

“I detest you. Get your cock inside me right now, you dumb fuck.”

 

***

It’s not very often that Harry and Louis fight. They see eye to eye too well to argue, but sometimes when the pressure of touring and bearding and management gets too much, they’ll snap at each other. It scares the boys more than anything, when they fight, because even fighting they do it in time.

They always know how to cut the deepest and still make each other laugh at the same time, but still. Seeing Louis throwing a whole actual chair at Harry and exclaiming ‘Sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up’ is a little close to the knuckle. Niall has to excuse himself because he’s laughing so hard, and Zayn just slowly closes the door and takes out a cigarette.

“Harry, you can’t read fanfiction about us and get upset over the actions my character did! You can’t do it!” Louis yells, stomping his foot and throwing a packet of popcorn seeds to the ground. Little seeds scatter everywhere.

Poor darlings, Harry thinks, they just want to be loved and respected.

“You slept with Greg James!” Harry retorts, contorting his face into a shape of someone who is Extremely Angry.

“And you wore panties in the fic I read! I’m not getting annoyed about the fact you don’t do that in real life, am I? Despite the fact that’d be really fucking hot, you hot son of a bitch!” Louis glares, tilting his face up and glaring right into Harry’s eyes.

“If you fucking want it, I’ll go out and buy a pair of panties right now!” Harry screams, and Louis nods angrily.

“I’d find that to be a pleasure, you beautiful prick!” Louis snarls, and then looks Harry over like he’s a mannequin and has clothes on that he’d really just love to tear off.

“What colour?!” Harry fumes, storming away from Louis and grabbing his coat, pushes his feet into a pair of pointy toed shoes that are fucking ridiculous and would encase Louis’s whole body. Harry really thinks Louis might be an actual pixie, the cute son of a fucker.

“Fucking green! It’ll compliment your eyes, you Dimpled Ass!” 

“I’ll go and buy them right now!” Harry yells, furious.

“Make sure to get some really pretty thigh highs to match your fucking stupid beanpole legs, you gorgeous gargantuan ogre!” 

“Oh, I will! I’ll make sure they fit really tight!”

“Well fucking go, then!”

And Harry goes to get panties that will only end up getting ripped off anyway with a furious glare on his face, knowing that he has enough fashion sense to get pretty green ones to please his fucking annoyingly hot fiancé.

***

This time, when they argue, Harry is scrolling through Tumblr, and comes across a really cool idea. It basically says that when you get in an argument with your partner, just breathe in helium and see who laughs first. 

So he leaves Louis, furious and spitting feathers, in their hotel room to buy a whole tank of helium. Because they might not be funny, but they sure as hell are endearing as fuck (people say it on Tumblr all the time; Harry checks). 

When he gets to the shop, Harry instantly drags the helium tank to the front of the store, pays for it, and nods curtly at the saleswoman, who looks both incredulous and slightly turned on. What the fuck ever. He’s going to get fucking sexually destroyed by his spouse, and then he’s going to whisper why Louis’ wrong into his ear, with helium in his lungs.

***

The third time when they argue, they’re in a meeting. Management is yelling that they need to stop being close, need to stop doing things people think are ‘hella gay’, and are trying to make them sign a contract.

Louis is furious, and Harry is, too, but Louis is the one being targeted. Louis is the one who’s going to end up being forced to see Eleanor, and then, even worse, end up having to announce that he’s getting engaged to Eleanor. Harry is mainly sad, because he knew this would happen. It’s fine when they’re on break, and out of the limelight, because nobody ever pays attention to things they do in private unless they’re already very dedicated shippers who won’t be swayed, anyway, but when they’re on tour, Management is constantly on their backs.  
“Lou, I love you. Hella amounts. I love you, even if you have to do this. I’ll suck your brain out of your meat stick if you do this. Please? And then take you on a secret date.” Harry says, and Louis just starts to whine.

Louis’s a petulant child when he wants to be, and today he appears to want to be. He starts kicking his feet and crying out, yelling expletives in a way he normally does when Harry completely destroys him. 

“This is what we mean,” Mr Modest! says, with a disgruntled sigh, “you can’t talk about sucking meat sticks. Homosexuality is largely disliked in this world. You can’t talk about this kind of thing.”

“Excuse you, Mr. Ass, do you even fuckin’ lift?” Harry asks, glaring into the face of Modest! Management with green and black eyes.

“I don’t know what you’re insinuating-”

“That you’re hella weak, Sir.” Louis snarls, smirking at his spouse with thin lips.

“Louis, do you think we should try the big H?” Harry asks, giving Louis a knowing look as he takes out a small gas container. 

The Manager of Modest! gives them a terrified glance, looking completely and utterly confused and concerned about everything.

“You’re not taking heroin in our meeting, boys.” He yells, voice high pitched and ridiculous.

Louis and Harry give each other a knowing smirk before lifting the helium to their lips. They’d made sure to put on two nozzles so they could inhale it together in situations like these, so they suck in at exactly the same time. They make sure to hollow their cheeks just to make Mr. Modest! very uncomfortable, because what’s life without mocking the bastards who destroy you when you know you’re two seconds from destroying them?

“You know, Mr. Modest, we’re having none of your crap.” They recite at exactly the same time, high pitched and ridiculous, before leaning in to kiss each other. They giggle as they pull away. “We’re ready to do what we want to do, and we have three boys who will support us no matter what. So, we’re going to come out whether you like it or not, Mr. Butthead.”

And they leave with smiles on their faces and helium in their lungs, blowing raspberries at the receptionist who gives them a distrustful glance.

She promptly begins shuffling papers around.

***

@Harry_Styles: Louis Tomlinson, will you marry me? (Yes, we read your fanfiction) (Yes, we’re gay together)

@Louis_Tomlinson: @Harry_Styles Yes, I will! I love you! (And, yes, we are) (You lot really are inventive aha!)

@NiallOfficial: @Louis_Tomlinson @Harry_Styles Proud of ya lads ! Can I be t best man ? x 

@zaynmalik: @NiallOfficial @Louis_Tomlinson @Harry_Styles Why can’t I be best man? aha :) x

@Real_Liam_Payne: @NiallOfficial @zaynmalik @Harry_Styles @Louis_Tomlinson why are you all leaving me put?

@Real_Liam_Payne: *out ! 

***

The next time Harry and Louis bicker, they’re out in Paris, talking about the one interview they did paired together. Only one. And it was one of the main things that made half of their fans believe they were together. 

They both reach for the helium at the same time, suck it out at the same time, and sigh at the same time.

 

“I love you, Mr Tomlinson.” Louis and Harry Tomlinson say at the same time, fingers linking together.

And they do.

FIN

**Author's Note:**

> [talk about harry the frog meme](http://loudshrugstyles.tumblr.com/)


End file.
